Bookish (Book Fetish)

If there's one essential lesson I could pass on to my kid - it's my love for books. I'd rather spend my last money on a book than clothes or food. That's why going to Book Sale and Power Books remain my weakest link, my sweet temptation whenever I go to the mall. I'm itching to buy the Anita Shreve and David Sedaris works on Sale. It's another birthday gift for myself to justify this impulse buying. Yet again.

I got lucky with Paulo Coelho's Pilgrimage. From P375 down to P129. Great find!

I'm reading it slowly. To digest everything.

Welcome 2007

I spent New Year's Eve filled with fireworks, wine, food that Mama used to prepare so it's like she's still alive (pancit bihon, lumpiang shanghai, macaroni salad and fried chicken) and dancing till 2am with Dad, Teret, Yen and of course Rye. I forgot to take pics though.

What I do have are New Year's Day pics of Rye. We spent the 1st day of the year sleeping since he also stayed up till 3am, watching and reading Barney, eating left-overs, tickling and hugging.

I'm having mixed feelings this new year. 2006 had been good to me. Very good in fact. I want to wish for a better 2007. I want to feel excited that there is something in store for me, something big, the mingling of tears-laughter-smile-snort variety. I can just feel it. I hope. Fingers crossed and wish on a chicken bone. But God is the God of good surprises. Surprise me LORD!

Busy busyhan

I'm busy with lotsa things - work load that needs to be done this week, there's our company Christmas party where I'm part of the organizing committee, a wedding of Yen's brother and I'm the emcee, gifts that need to be purchased and the noche buena preparations. And I still have to think of Rye's gift too. But I love December. It's so cheery and the air's so cool.

Rye's latest antic is dancing to Boom Tarat. I know I've been very vocal that I dislike Willy and his deadly show but it was Len who taught him that. But it's cute though. Especially at 5.45 am.

I brought Rye to the office and to the church party, he was such a show-off! He wasn't overwhelmed at all even if kids were fussing over him, trying to carry him and all. Buti na lang at hindi takot sa tao. And the weird thing is he's got more cash than I am. Talk about unfair!

Everyone was saying he looked like a girl coz of his long hair. But I still couldn't deal with having his first hair cut coz that would mean he's not a baby anymore. And he will look like a toddler already. And I can't bear that yet. Di ko kaya. And besides, I love his curls. I wanted curls when I was a kid.

I love this year's holiday season. It's better compared to last year. I feel soo blessed.

Oh, and I'm playing badminton with the office pips. Gotta shape up. Ouch. Muscles. Sore.

Top 10 Picks

Been reading Patty's blog and got inspired with her top 10. So this is my list..

Top ten

1. Natalie Portman – beauty and brains, very intimidating in Closer
2. Kate Hudson – fresh and vibrant, loved her in Almost Famous – she made me cry in her delivery of “what kind of beer?”
3. Kimberly Williams – see previous entry
4. Angelina Jolie – her sexiness is so blatant even when she’s fully clothed
5. Ashley Judd – I love her smile, her low voice
6. Mikee Cojuangco – her simplicity just reels me in, super charming
7. Lea Salonga – wala na kong masabi
8. Julia Ormond – I saw her first in Legends of the Fall and then in First Knight, breathtakingly beautiful
9. Gloria Romero – the classic beauty, ageless
10. Evangeline Lily – I love her face, her body – anyone would want to get lost in an island with her

Top 10 Guys
1. Tom Cruise – since Topgun I was gone!
2. George Clooney – ER days when he was canoodling in the trauma room with Nurse Hathaway
3. Patrick Dempsey – loved him when he was a teenager, got smitten again when I saw him in Lucky 7 and now in Grey’s
4. Orlando Bloom – he was gorgeous in LOTR but oh so sexy in Elizabethtown
5. Jake Gyllenhaal – his eyes were baiting me in Moonlight Mile
6. Wentworth Miller – haven’t seen a whole episode of Prison Break but watched him in The Human Stain – gorgeous, reminds me of someone hehe
7. Matthew Fox – saw him first in Party of Five but loved him in LOST
8. Richard Gere – fell in love with him in Pretty Woman and on and on
9. Keanu Reeves – he was the dorky fellow in Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey but he was the hunka babe in A Walk in the Clouds
10. Aga Muhlach - since Bagets till now, will always be a fan

I don't know if there's a pattern with these choices, basta they're beautiful. They make me want to fall in love, they inspire me..

1 year and 6 months

Rye celebrated his 18 month mark by attending a Jollibee bday party of his good friend Andrei. He just stared at Jollibee, was more interested munching his Chickenjoy and dancing to the music. I think Rye has made me more sociable. He has "forced" me to mingle. Therefore, he has made me more human. Hahaha.

Trivia:

• gives back his bottle to me after he's done feeding
• whispers back when I whisper first
• claps his hands while watching "Philippine Idol"
• knows how to play ball
• calls me "Meeee.." which I think is short for Mommy
• says "Ah-nyeee" when he wants something
• knows the sound of an airplane
• immitates the sneezing sound "Acheee" and laughs when he sneezes
• talks in a questioning tone
• fond of tails and wheels
• uses the cd as "bunot" - so some of my poor cds now have hideous scratch marks and can't be played
• when feeding, he lets me smell his feet (my favorite part)
• pikon
• knows when I'm inside the toilet and pounds the door
• loves to brush his teeth
• loves to take a bath and sprinkles water to the poor person giving him a bath (me!)
• always mistaken for a girl due to his uncut curly hair
• when I come home, he always claps his hands (awww)

wala lang

Ngayon ko lang na-realized that I have a problem with "normalcy" or plateau moments. Ung tipong steady lang, walang nangyayaring kakaiba. I have this excitement addiction. Ung dapat may weird na situation or something new all the time that's happening to me. Kahit negative basta it would make my heart beat faster or have this adrenalin rush. Bored na bored ako when the week passes na stay put lang ako. Gusto kong maging reporter dati. I imagined travelling to war-torn places and barely escape being shot, ma-action. Madrama. Gusto ko noon ng documentary. Ang sabi ko sa Probe ako magwork. Kasi idol ko yung 2nd cousin kong si Kara Magsanoc-Alikpala (yes, ung nanay nya ang Editor in chief ng Inquirer).

Pero di ko alam kung bakit napunta ko sa pang-showbiz, pang-lifestyle na klase ng work. Tapos natuwa din ako sa PBA noon. Gusto kong magtrabaho sa Vintage Sports. Nag-struggle na din ako nun, parang nababawan ako sa ginagawa ko. But then kung makakapagpasaya naman ng tao ung show o kaya matutong kumanta, I think may kabuluhan din di ba. Tsaka pag performance night, proud na proud ung mga parents sa anak nila. As coach (kahit na feeling ko kulang ako sa credentials), fulfilling yun sobra.

I'm still wondering kung ano pang field of work ang pwede kong gawin. Ung marketing nga nagulat ako kasi wala naman akong subject na ganito at all nung college. It's great to learn as I go along. Wag lang akong magbenta kasi di ako magaling mag convince or mag helpdesk kasi mahihiblood lang ako. Ok na ko sa research at magsulat. At gumawa ng radio ad. At syempre kumanta for a living. Gusto ko magback up. Dream ko yun. Yung anonymous ka pero mas magaling ka sa lead singer. bwahaha.

Kaya nga natatawa ko ngayon. Kasi my weekends are the same unless I have to really go to an important appointment. Bond with Rye, watch tv or film, read a book and sleep. Mas gusto ko pang matulog ngayon kesa lumabas. Kaya nga nung nag-Malate kami, namiss ko ung place pero at the same time, I knew I could never be as carefree or as puyat or as tipsy tulad ng dati. Iba na talaga. Pero di ako nag-regret (motto ko yan kahit ayaw maniwala ng iba) kasi na-enjoy ko naman lahat eh. Hinihintay ko lang na maglakad ng maayos si Rye bago maglakwatsa kasama sya. Naglalakad na sya pero pag trip nya lang tsaka pag may nanonood. Pasikat nga.

Walang pattern itong entry ko pero I think the bottom line is I still have a lot to do. I want to surprise myself. Ayokong nilalagay ako sa kahon. I'm too complicated.

Kimmy

There's another celebrity I absolutely love. It's Kimberly Williams-Paisley. From the first moment I saw her in "Father of the Bride" then in "Relativity" (which is my 2nd favorite series of all time next to "My So-Called Life") and "Lucky 7", a made for tv movie, I knew she was amazing. Her husband Brad is a famous country singer. He has this enormous crush on her that he especially requested that she be included in his music video. Here's a song in his album, I haven't heard it but the lyrics sure are cute;)

She's Everything

She's a yellow pair of running shoes

A holey pair of jeans

She looks great in cheap sunglasses

She looks great in anything

She's I want a piece of chocolate

Take me to a movie

She's I can't find a thing to wear

Now and then she's moody

She's a Saturn with a sunroof

With her brown hair a-blowing

She's a soft place to land

And a good feeling knowing

She's a warm conversation

That I wouldn't miss for nothing

She's a fighter when she's mad

And she's a lover when she's loving

[Chorus]

And she's everything I ever wanted

And everything I need

I talk about her, I go on and on and on

'Cause she's everything to me

She's a Saturday out on the town

And a church girl on Sunday

She's a cross around her neck

And a cuss word 'cause its Monday

She's a bubble bath and candles

Baby come and kiss me

She's a one glass of wine

And she's feeling kinda tipsy

She's the giver I wish I could be

And the stealer of the covers

She's a picture in my wallet

Of my unborn children's mother

She's the hand that I'm holding

When I'm on my knees and praying

She's the answer to my prayer

And she's the song that I'm playing

She's the voice I love to hear

Someday when I'm ninety

She's that wooden rocking chair

I want rocking right beside me

Everyday that passes I only love her more

Yeah, she's the one

That I'd lay down my own life for

And she's everything I ever wanted

And everything I need

She's everything to me

Yeah she's everything to me

Everything I ever wanted

And everything I need

She's everything to me

We care!

One Saturday my Marketing family and I troop to He Cares Foundation to give them one day they won't forget, I hope. These street children were going to have a party thanks to generous people in our office. We had face painting and parlor games with cool toys as prizes. It was my first time to unleash the creative (albeit frustrated) side of me thru live canvass hehe. It was great that the kids were good sports even if I couldn't do dragons and other difficult images they want painted on their cute faces.

We also had an Amazing Race time when we purchased the toys in Divi. We had to be done in an hour during lunch break and we did it! Hooray..

november na, anu vah!

1. Yourself: thankful

2. Your child: happy show-off

3. Your hair: auburn brown

4. Your mother: amazing

5. Your Father: ideal

6. Your Favorite Item: book

7. Your dream last night: weird

8. Your Favorite drink: strawberry iced tea

9. Your Dream Car: benz

10. The Room You Are In: office

11. Your fear: filler (for the void, for the ex)

12. What you want to be in 10 years: back-up singer

13. Who you hung out with last night? family

14. What You're Not: crass

15. Muffins: choco chip

16. One of your Wish List Items: magic sing

17. The Last Thing You Did: write

18. What You Are Wearing: blouse

19. Your Favorite Weather: sunny

20. Your Favorite Book: Love Song

21. What Is The Last Thing You Ate: fish

22. Your Life: peaceful

23. Your Mood: dark

24. Your body: getting fat

25. What are you thinking about right now: relationships

26. Food: choco chip cookies

27. What are you doing at the moment: typing

28. Your summer: great

halo-halo thoughts on halloween

I'm sad today. i just learned that Ryan Philippe and Reese have split up. I love them as a couple. I have this thing for famous couples. It's either I love 'em or hate 'em. No in betweens. And I get really affected for days..like TomKat. That was hard to accept. But when I saw Suri, it changed everything. She's so beautiful.

I need a new book. Since last year, I didn't buy any new one since there are still some I haven't even started reading yet. So ok, I'm gonna try hard to find time for them soon so I can justify my new book purchase.

Yesterday, Yen and I had an impulse to go walking - my bones are starting to complain already while Yen was feeling sluggish. So off we went for a two hour walkathon. And it feels so good. I wish I could do it everyday. I know I can be sporty if I commit myself to it but...;) Maybe that could be my new year resolution.

My ate is 40 years old. She doesn't want to acknowledge it but yes she is starting her life today! My only sister is my role model. She's so different from me and yet we're the same. She's got great fair skin, can dance so well and is a fashionista. I get make-up and clothing tips from her. She is classy and her style is impeccable. She's organized, a squeaky clean girl. We're both quiet among other people but really loud when we're together and can be push-overs ( as in uto-uto ng mga taong panget hahaha). But we are shopaholics, we can spend the entire day at the mall and just find bargains for hours. We can read each other's minds. We never fight. The only time she got mad at me was 2 years ago but then it was over in 2.7 seconds. I love her generous heart and her fighting spirit. Just like my mom.

My Ate is my 2nd mom. The first time I ever got depressed was when she left for the States when I was 12 years old. I was inconsolable for weeks. I was just crying and pouting and wishing the world would end soon. She makes me want to be a better person and taught me not to settle. She took off the blindfold and made me see the light. Thank you so much Ate Mael. She was supposed to be named Cecilia Joy. I love you. Can't wait for another vacation with you and the kids!

I hope I can present the man you had in mind for me. Just you wait. Matagal-tagal pa. Hirap ng packaging. hahaha. Pero natuto na ko. Pramis.

year-end thoughts

Whenever November comes around, December is just a breath away. Next thing you know, it's frenzied shopping and partying galore. And then it's Christmas Eve and then New Year. and then my birthday..heehee.

When I was younger, I used to take stock of how my year turned out. I wrote monthly milestones and then capped the journal entry with some form of closure. a goodbye hello ritual. Now I only write my thoughts online and I missed my scribbles, the way my hand hurts from too much writing.

This year has been really slow and steady. Peaceful. Just watching my boy grow (walking, mimicking, cruising, tight hugging). Being with my sister and her kids (the best vacation ever). Being with Yen (ang haba ng hair - pila ang guys). And Dad (got him back from the wicked witch..hooray for the triumph of good vs. evil!). Assessing friendships. A new nephew (congrats jundee, hindi ka baog). A pleasant surprise which is still a work in progress (keeping my fingers crossed).

It's a time of getting more comfortable being a mother and acknowledging that my life is now more focused and more fulfilled. It's trusting the Lord when there are seemingly insurmountable obstacles. And then just believing..inspired by the mustard seed principle. I know a lot of changes will happen next year. I can sensed it as early as now. I just hope they're good changes. Super Didooper!

Now I'm excited for Christmas. Last year was chaotic since we were moving out and stuff. This time we're staying, building roots. Getting settled. Feels so good...

Rye @ 17 mos baby!

Rye is 17 months today and is now walking! Yes, ladies and gentlemen - the much-awaited moment has finally arrived. At around 10.30 pm last night I saw my son took 4 steps alone and has this goofy grin on his face, like saying "hey, I'm a real toddler now, watch me go!" My dad was responsible for this major feat. He was the one who first saw him walk yesterday.

So I'm still reeling from the experience of seeing this little man take his first steps. I'm proud of course but a little weepy. He's not a baby anymore technically but he'll always be my Batootoot.

Nid a digicam soo bad so I can shoot all his milestones. I haven't printed the summer pix yet. Wahh..

I love it when he hugs me super tight. I can't thank God enuf for this one.

Welcome Gabby!

Meet my nephew who came out into the world just today at 12.24 am..Hellow Gabriel Matencio! Welcome to our zany, wacky, loony menagerie..the 8th wonder apo of Daddy Dad.

failure and success

Failure:
You think you like someone and then you get mixed signals if he likes you back. And then now you're confused and dunno where to proceed. You're scared of taking risks because you've been badly burned. And you've just completely recovered. How can you jump into the foray again??! You feel too much and it just won't go away...

Success:
You get an out of the blue text message from a looong time friend whom you dated thrice and then went kaput. You don't even remember why it didn't work out. You just knew he kissed you once and didn't feel a thing. It feels good to know he's hoping that all is well with you. It feels great to know that after 6 years, about 2 or 3 guys are still wondering how you are doing.

Advisory: real name withheld

16 months baby!

Riley is 1 year and 4 months today. He's got a surprise coming up in November. It's sentimental because it's the same month I first learned I was pregnant. Oh wow!

my human alarm clock

Rye woke up at exactly 4:57 am today. What's so adorable about him is that the moment he wakes up, he just suddenly stands up and looks outside the window. And in the process, steps on my face with his huge feet. My son is the only human being who can step on me literally. And who can never make me cranky even at this ungodly hour. How could I when he would smile (6 teeth emerging) at me or just make loud and weird vowel-consonant sounds..How could I not thank God for this cutesie?

And then when I come home, he just waits for me so I can lull him to sleep and put him to bed. Ahh, my constant comfort no matter how good or bad my day turned out..

I Miss you so much Mama

Your Mother is always with you
She's the whisper of the leaves
as you walk down the street
she's the smell of bleach
in your freshly laundered socks
she's the cool hand on your brow
when you’re not well
Your Mom lives inside your laughter
And she's crystallized in every tear drop
She's the place you came from
your first home
and she's the map you follow
with every step you take
She's your first love
and your first heartbreak
and nothing on earth
can separate you
Not even death

I miss you soo much Ma. Hope you got to meet Rye. He got your social skills and your smile. I know you're always with me. In dreams. In songs. In signs. Always. I love you. See you soon!

in hello

Lynette ver.7.0

I think I need upgrading!

sigh.

Pagsibol

I've heard this song again last night during Mass. And whenever I hear it, I just want to cry. It's so beautiful! Bukas Palad songs just refreshes my soul..

Pagsibol (Lyrics and Chords)
Arnel Aquino SJ
Album and Score Book: The Best of Himig Heswita
Intro: (4/4) E-EM7/D#-C#m-C#m/B-AM7-F#m7-Bsus-B7

E EM7 C#m C#m/B A-F#m7
Bawat huni ng ibon sa pag-ihip ng amihan
Bsus B7-E
Wangis Mo'y aking natatanaw
EM7 C#m C#m/B A-F#m7
Pagdampi ng umaga sa nanlamig kong kalamnan
Bsus B7
Init Mo'y pangarap kong hagkan.

Koro1:
E E/G# F#m7 B
Panginoon, Ikaw ang kasibulan ng buhay
B7 E E/G# G#m7-C#7sus
Puso'y dalisay kailanpaman.
C#7 F#m7 Am G#m7-C#m7
Ipahintulot Mong ako'y mapahandusay
F#m7 Bsus B7 E - EM7/D# C#m
Sa sumasaibayong kaginhawahan.
C#m7/B - AM7 -F#m7 - Bsus - B

2. (Same Chords)
Nangungulilang malay, binulungan ng tinig Mong
Nagdulot ng katiwasayan
Paghahanap katwiran, nilusaw Mo sa simbuyong
karilagan ng pagmamahal (Koro1)

Koro2: (Transpose) Bb/C
C7 F F/A Gm7 C7sus
Panginoon, Ikaw ang kasibulan ng buhay
C7 F F/A Am7-D7sus
Puso'y dalisay kailanpaman.
BbM7 Bbm7 Am7 - Dm
Ipahintulot Mong ako'y mapahandusay
Dm7 Gm7 Bbm C7 Am7-Dm
Sa sumasaibayong kaginhawahan.
Gm7 Bbm7 Am7 - Dm
Dalangin pa sana'y mapagtanto kong tunay
Dm/C Gm7 Bb7 C7 F
Kaganapan ng buhay ko'y Ikaw lamang.
F/E-Dm-Dm7/C-BbM7-Gm7-C-F

----------------------------------------------

"be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a foreign tongue. do not seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. and the point is, to live everything. live the questions now. perhaps you will find them gradually, without noticing it, and live along some distant day into the answer."

Exactly.

Thank God for blogs and for those who have them and I consider these people my friends even if they don't know me. I have local blog sites and foreign ones in my Favorites. And I learn a lot from them. Especially at this time...

My favorite show as of today

"Okay, here it is, your choice... it's simple, her or me, and I'm sure she is really great. But Derek, I love you, in a really, really big pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me, choose me, love me."

- Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

When on earth can I possibly have the guts to say this to any guy????? Argghhh!

Of course, Derek also has his own heart stopping line:

"Shut up. -- My mother's maiden name is Maloney. I have four sisters, eight nieces and five nephews. I like coffee ice cream, single malt Scotch and occasionally a good cigar. I fly fish, I cheat when I do the Sunday crossword puzzle and I don't dance in public. My favorite color is blue. And not that light blue. Indigo. The Sun Also Rises? Favorite novel. The Clash? Favorite band. This tiny little scar by my nose? That's why I don't ride motor-cycles anymore. And I live in that trailer! And
all this land is mine and I have no idea what I'm gonna do with it!! That's it, that's all you've earned. For now. The rest...well, the rest you'll have to
take on faith."