America: GunFULL society

My heart is breaking for those who died at Virginia Tech. I saw "Bowling at Columbine" a few years before and I'm still horrified as to how these kids get guns easily and have so much rage in their hearts to shoot and kill on purpose. What kind of society produces such mean killling machines? And they're just KIDS.

Is it the bullying they receive from fellow students? How hard is it to go to school and get picked on everyday when you're not cool or popular enough? Are the kids of America absolutely clueless of their bad treatment of the uncool?

Is it the violence in videogames or movies? Tell us please. The world wants to know.

My brother in law in the US said he'll bring my nephews here to study high school.

And I sighed in utmost relief.

WinWin

Included in my ideal guy list (super shortlisted lang yan) is none other than my dear old cousin Win. The first time I saw him was when our Lolo Pulis died and we were just 3 and 4 years old. After that, hindi na kami nagkita at all. Yung next was when our uncle died, medyo grim di ba but it was the start of a great friendship. Si Win helped me with my career path, tapos sunod sunod na yun.

Pati sa gimik, relationship advice at kung anu ano pa. Sya yung kasama ko from taping, to Malate, to audition pati ang pagkaloka ko meeting Lea Salonga up close and watching Miss Saigon. He never fails to make me smile, laugh and everything in between. Here's to hanging out at Starbucks UN and Greenbelt 1. He tried to right the wrong in my life but I was just soo damn stubborn and yet he never judged me. He just silently prayed for me to come around. And I did in God's time.

I knew he was there for me throughout my struggle.

When he got married (buti na lang he waited for the right girl to come along), hindi ako nakapunta kasi birthday din ni Rye yun but I wanted to be there. Being an only child, alam ko super excited na sya to be a dad soon. Finally. It's going to be such a blast.

Sabi nya noon sa testimonial nya for me, "masasaktan ang magpapaiyak sa pinsan ko" and that "she reminds me of God's goodness in the world". It was enough to make me cry kasi nakakatouch talaga. Don't worry cuz, pinaiyak ko din ang nag-cause ng heartbreak sa yo! (i'm sooo bad).

Nakakatuwa lang that he (and Kay) ang mga kamag-anak ko na malapit ko rin na friends. Although we don't get to see each other as often as before( but I think that's gonna change yahoo!) hindi pa rin magbabago ang samahan namin. Ngayon lalo na mga magulang na kami.

I want to thank the Lord for Win. He's been such a blessing.

Life with Win is a win-win situation.

What is Easter?

What is Easter?

A Sunday where the sun shines a bit brighter than usual

Mass with family – Rye screaming to hold the candle and the whole church looks at him

waking up at 6am to give wide awake Rye to Dad and sleep again

watching 3 Sunday TV Masses because I'm spying on the latest choir songs

eating tuyo, tinapa, fried talong and peanuts

listening to Rye say “Rabbit” “Monkey” and “Viva” over and over

getting a phone call from my sister

watching dvds while having chips overload

reading (hurrah!) the book on my bedside table that has accumulated dust already

tickling Rye and watching him dive on top of his cousins

laughing at baby Gab who looks like comedian “Balot”

thanking God for saving me and the rest of humanity

Nami Cebu

I'd just have to say: if I can move to another city here in the country, it's gotta be Cebu! Less traffic, less people but beautiful ones I tell you, more food and they have a sense of style that I can't define.
9 days in Cebu kept me in good spirits (though I missed my Rye soo much) especially when I laid eyes on Plantation Bay at night. It's pretty romantic. Sigh.

Went to the Taoist Temple and found great accessories in Colon.

Here's our food trips:
Bo's Coffee Club - raspberry iced tea
Golden Cowrie - tuna belly and garlic clams
Krua Thai - crispy beef (tastes like crispy pata)
Larsian - street ihaw-ihaw (chicken etc.)
Tomato - pana cotta (leche flan ice cream)
Dimsum Break - great chinese food
Abuhaw - in IT Park, love sizzling pochero
Venetian Coffee - choco latte
AA - sugba
Bigby's - first discovered in Davao and now in Ayala Cebu
MT Korean Resto - my first on a low dining table
Harbour City - chinese ulet
Bean Date - moist choco cake and strawberry shortcake
Roma Mia - chef's pizza
Lami-ah - Filipino resto with a cultural show

Dami ko pang kwento. I just need to adjust pa my sensory overload. And download the pics..

Davao Travel Blog

Davao is clean. That's the first thing I noticed. Walang kalat sa streets. The best sa food. Been in Harana Resto, Jack's Ridge - overlooking the whole city at may WWII history pa, Miggy's Grill at Times Beach - with the waves lapping while we're eating, gimik at Pop's (although I felt so ancient there kasi puro mga JS Prom highschoolers ang andun), lunch at Bigby's (wla pa silang branch here in Manila but the food is great and the theme is ala-Moulin Rouge so cool!) Meron ding shop called Mags where the clothes are great at cheaper compared dito.

We attended presscons at The Marco Polo Hotel and Royal Mandaya. On the last day, we had a city tour and passed by the church that's shaped like a ship and looks like a mosque din meaning Muslims and Christians live in harmony in Davao. Syempre punta kami sa batik store with lots of great finds na bracelets and other trinkets. Since wla naman akong budget tlga, puro mga small anik-anik lang ang nabili ko. And of course the pomelo, which I had a stomachache for eating just one! Eh kasi nung umaga ko kinain eh. Ayan tuloy. Pumunta din kami sa Lola Abon's durian sweets.

Super pagod pero super happy din. The travel show was fun kahit sumakit ang paa ko katatayo at kakabigay ng flyers sa mga umatend. Ang dami ko ring kinuhang flyers kasi malay mo mega fly kami ni Riley next time di ba. Finally, nakapunta na kong Mindanao. Thank You Lord. Hindi ko tlga expect na makakasama ako but You made it all happen!

Next stop: Cebu! (after 7 years)

I'm living the life of Lorelai Gilmore!

Rye dictionary

Please refer to the translation on the right side:

Baba – Bye
Mommy / Mama – me
Daddy – my daddy dad
Pooh – Winnie the Pooh
Coocoo – Blues Clues puppy
Anye-anye – Give me, I want
Abook – book
Wow - !
Ok - !

He's into Blues Clues now. He's obssessed with the images on his shirt / pajama. He knows how to act like he's crying to get what he wants. He loves to just talk and make "angkas" on the bike. He's smitten with the guitar and the microphone.

Rye's 1st haircut

I thought I couldn't do it. I thought I was gonna cry. I thought I would delay it further. But I knew it was time. He acted like a grown-up. He was too mature, "di ko kaya"...

Birthday Week

Jan 2 - Starbucks night with Yen, Jen and Jamal (despedida)

Jan 4 - 1st Thursday Mass of the year / bday treat of Tagumpay

Jan 5 - Treat of Kuya Obet with Yen's family and Pyro Olympics

Jan 6 - Mexican theme party at home with the whole family and videoke

Jan 7 - My real bday spent with Riley's Ninangs, Sunday Mass with Dad and Choco Sansrival c/o Tamay

Jan 8 - Office treat together with Sir, Mam Jean and Ms. Merlie

How's that huh! So blessed. So undeserving. So overwhelmed. So grateful.

Thank you for the greetings, the gifts and the wishes. I blew my 1st cake using a vigil candle and at home, it's the aromatherapy candle on top of a melting double dutch ice cream care of jen. talk about weird. and my son is hyper, my mascot!

Even if people think I'm 30 (heller), I'm just soo happy. The type of happy that's serene, accepting and my heart swelled twice its size.

Bookish (Book Fetish)

If there's one essential lesson I could pass on to my kid - it's my love for books. I'd rather spend my last money on a book than clothes or food. That's why going to Book Sale and Power Books remain my weakest link, my sweet temptation whenever I go to the mall. I'm itching to buy the Anita Shreve and David Sedaris works on Sale. It's another birthday gift for myself to justify this impulse buying. Yet again.

I got lucky with Paulo Coelho's Pilgrimage. From P375 down to P129. Great find!

I'm reading it slowly. To digest everything.

Welcome 2007

I spent New Year's Eve filled with fireworks, wine, food that Mama used to prepare so it's like she's still alive (pancit bihon, lumpiang shanghai, macaroni salad and fried chicken) and dancing till 2am with Dad, Teret, Yen and of course Rye. I forgot to take pics though.

What I do have are New Year's Day pics of Rye. We spent the 1st day of the year sleeping since he also stayed up till 3am, watching and reading Barney, eating left-overs, tickling and hugging.

I'm having mixed feelings this new year. 2006 had been good to me. Very good in fact. I want to wish for a better 2007. I want to feel excited that there is something in store for me, something big, the mingling of tears-laughter-smile-snort variety. I can just feel it. I hope. Fingers crossed and wish on a chicken bone. But God is the God of good surprises. Surprise me LORD!

Busy busyhan

I'm busy with lotsa things - work load that needs to be done this week, there's our company Christmas party where I'm part of the organizing committee, a wedding of Yen's brother and I'm the emcee, gifts that need to be purchased and the noche buena preparations. And I still have to think of Rye's gift too. But I love December. It's so cheery and the air's so cool.

Rye's latest antic is dancing to Boom Tarat. I know I've been very vocal that I dislike Willy and his deadly show but it was Len who taught him that. But it's cute though. Especially at 5.45 am.

I brought Rye to the office and to the church party, he was such a show-off! He wasn't overwhelmed at all even if kids were fussing over him, trying to carry him and all. Buti na lang at hindi takot sa tao. And the weird thing is he's got more cash than I am. Talk about unfair!

Everyone was saying he looked like a girl coz of his long hair. But I still couldn't deal with having his first hair cut coz that would mean he's not a baby anymore. And he will look like a toddler already. And I can't bear that yet. Di ko kaya. And besides, I love his curls. I wanted curls when I was a kid.

I love this year's holiday season. It's better compared to last year. I feel soo blessed.

Oh, and I'm playing badminton with the office pips. Gotta shape up. Ouch. Muscles. Sore.

Top 10 Picks

Been reading Patty's blog and got inspired with her top 10. So this is my list..

Top ten

1. Natalie Portman – beauty and brains, very intimidating in Closer
2. Kate Hudson – fresh and vibrant, loved her in Almost Famous – she made me cry in her delivery of “what kind of beer?”
3. Kimberly Williams – see previous entry
4. Angelina Jolie – her sexiness is so blatant even when she’s fully clothed
5. Ashley Judd – I love her smile, her low voice
6. Mikee Cojuangco – her simplicity just reels me in, super charming
7. Lea Salonga – wala na kong masabi
8. Julia Ormond – I saw her first in Legends of the Fall and then in First Knight, breathtakingly beautiful
9. Gloria Romero – the classic beauty, ageless
10. Evangeline Lily – I love her face, her body – anyone would want to get lost in an island with her

Top 10 Guys
1. Tom Cruise – since Topgun I was gone!
2. George Clooney – ER days when he was canoodling in the trauma room with Nurse Hathaway
3. Patrick Dempsey – loved him when he was a teenager, got smitten again when I saw him in Lucky 7 and now in Grey’s
4. Orlando Bloom – he was gorgeous in LOTR but oh so sexy in Elizabethtown
5. Jake Gyllenhaal – his eyes were baiting me in Moonlight Mile
6. Wentworth Miller – haven’t seen a whole episode of Prison Break but watched him in The Human Stain – gorgeous, reminds me of someone hehe
7. Matthew Fox – saw him first in Party of Five but loved him in LOST
8. Richard Gere – fell in love with him in Pretty Woman and on and on
9. Keanu Reeves – he was the dorky fellow in Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey but he was the hunka babe in A Walk in the Clouds
10. Aga Muhlach - since Bagets till now, will always be a fan

I don't know if there's a pattern with these choices, basta they're beautiful. They make me want to fall in love, they inspire me..

1 year and 6 months

Rye celebrated his 18 month mark by attending a Jollibee bday party of his good friend Andrei. He just stared at Jollibee, was more interested munching his Chickenjoy and dancing to the music. I think Rye has made me more sociable. He has "forced" me to mingle. Therefore, he has made me more human. Hahaha.

Trivia:

• gives back his bottle to me after he's done feeding
• whispers back when I whisper first
• claps his hands while watching "Philippine Idol"
• knows how to play ball
• calls me "Meeee.." which I think is short for Mommy
• says "Ah-nyeee" when he wants something
• knows the sound of an airplane
• immitates the sneezing sound "Acheee" and laughs when he sneezes
• talks in a questioning tone
• fond of tails and wheels
• uses the cd as "bunot" - so some of my poor cds now have hideous scratch marks and can't be played
• when feeding, he lets me smell his feet (my favorite part)
• pikon
• knows when I'm inside the toilet and pounds the door
• loves to brush his teeth
• loves to take a bath and sprinkles water to the poor person giving him a bath (me!)
• always mistaken for a girl due to his uncut curly hair
• when I come home, he always claps his hands (awww)

wala lang

Ngayon ko lang na-realized that I have a problem with "normalcy" or plateau moments. Ung tipong steady lang, walang nangyayaring kakaiba. I have this excitement addiction. Ung dapat may weird na situation or something new all the time that's happening to me. Kahit negative basta it would make my heart beat faster or have this adrenalin rush. Bored na bored ako when the week passes na stay put lang ako. Gusto kong maging reporter dati. I imagined travelling to war-torn places and barely escape being shot, ma-action. Madrama. Gusto ko noon ng documentary. Ang sabi ko sa Probe ako magwork. Kasi idol ko yung 2nd cousin kong si Kara Magsanoc-Alikpala (yes, ung nanay nya ang Editor in chief ng Inquirer).

Pero di ko alam kung bakit napunta ko sa pang-showbiz, pang-lifestyle na klase ng work. Tapos natuwa din ako sa PBA noon. Gusto kong magtrabaho sa Vintage Sports. Nag-struggle na din ako nun, parang nababawan ako sa ginagawa ko. But then kung makakapagpasaya naman ng tao ung show o kaya matutong kumanta, I think may kabuluhan din di ba. Tsaka pag performance night, proud na proud ung mga parents sa anak nila. As coach (kahit na feeling ko kulang ako sa credentials), fulfilling yun sobra.

I'm still wondering kung ano pang field of work ang pwede kong gawin. Ung marketing nga nagulat ako kasi wala naman akong subject na ganito at all nung college. It's great to learn as I go along. Wag lang akong magbenta kasi di ako magaling mag convince or mag helpdesk kasi mahihiblood lang ako. Ok na ko sa research at magsulat. At gumawa ng radio ad. At syempre kumanta for a living. Gusto ko magback up. Dream ko yun. Yung anonymous ka pero mas magaling ka sa lead singer. bwahaha.

Kaya nga natatawa ko ngayon. Kasi my weekends are the same unless I have to really go to an important appointment. Bond with Rye, watch tv or film, read a book and sleep. Mas gusto ko pang matulog ngayon kesa lumabas. Kaya nga nung nag-Malate kami, namiss ko ung place pero at the same time, I knew I could never be as carefree or as puyat or as tipsy tulad ng dati. Iba na talaga. Pero di ako nag-regret (motto ko yan kahit ayaw maniwala ng iba) kasi na-enjoy ko naman lahat eh. Hinihintay ko lang na maglakad ng maayos si Rye bago maglakwatsa kasama sya. Naglalakad na sya pero pag trip nya lang tsaka pag may nanonood. Pasikat nga.

Walang pattern itong entry ko pero I think the bottom line is I still have a lot to do. I want to surprise myself. Ayokong nilalagay ako sa kahon. I'm too complicated.

Kimmy

There's another celebrity I absolutely love. It's Kimberly Williams-Paisley. From the first moment I saw her in "Father of the Bride" then in "Relativity" (which is my 2nd favorite series of all time next to "My So-Called Life") and "Lucky 7", a made for tv movie, I knew she was amazing. Her husband Brad is a famous country singer. He has this enormous crush on her that he especially requested that she be included in his music video. Here's a song in his album, I haven't heard it but the lyrics sure are cute;)

She's Everything

She's a yellow pair of running shoes

A holey pair of jeans

She looks great in cheap sunglasses

She looks great in anything

She's I want a piece of chocolate

Take me to a movie

She's I can't find a thing to wear

Now and then she's moody

She's a Saturn with a sunroof

With her brown hair a-blowing

She's a soft place to land

And a good feeling knowing

She's a warm conversation

That I wouldn't miss for nothing

She's a fighter when she's mad

And she's a lover when she's loving

[Chorus]

And she's everything I ever wanted

And everything I need

I talk about her, I go on and on and on

'Cause she's everything to me

She's a Saturday out on the town

And a church girl on Sunday

She's a cross around her neck

And a cuss word 'cause its Monday

She's a bubble bath and candles

Baby come and kiss me

She's a one glass of wine

And she's feeling kinda tipsy

She's the giver I wish I could be

And the stealer of the covers

She's a picture in my wallet

Of my unborn children's mother

She's the hand that I'm holding

When I'm on my knees and praying

She's the answer to my prayer

And she's the song that I'm playing

She's the voice I love to hear

Someday when I'm ninety

She's that wooden rocking chair

I want rocking right beside me

Everyday that passes I only love her more

Yeah, she's the one

That I'd lay down my own life for

And she's everything I ever wanted

And everything I need

She's everything to me

Yeah she's everything to me

Everything I ever wanted

And everything I need

She's everything to me

We care!

One Saturday my Marketing family and I troop to He Cares Foundation to give them one day they won't forget, I hope. These street children were going to have a party thanks to generous people in our office. We had face painting and parlor games with cool toys as prizes. It was my first time to unleash the creative (albeit frustrated) side of me thru live canvass hehe. It was great that the kids were good sports even if I couldn't do dragons and other difficult images they want painted on their cute faces.

We also had an Amazing Race time when we purchased the toys in Divi. We had to be done in an hour during lunch break and we did it! Hooray..

november na, anu vah!

1. Yourself: thankful

2. Your child: happy show-off

3. Your hair: auburn brown

4. Your mother: amazing

5. Your Father: ideal

6. Your Favorite Item: book

7. Your dream last night: weird

8. Your Favorite drink: strawberry iced tea

9. Your Dream Car: benz

10. The Room You Are In: office

11. Your fear: filler (for the void, for the ex)

12. What you want to be in 10 years: back-up singer

13. Who you hung out with last night? family

14. What You're Not: crass

15. Muffins: choco chip

16. One of your Wish List Items: magic sing

17. The Last Thing You Did: write

18. What You Are Wearing: blouse

19. Your Favorite Weather: sunny

20. Your Favorite Book: Love Song

21. What Is The Last Thing You Ate: fish

22. Your Life: peaceful

23. Your Mood: dark

24. Your body: getting fat

25. What are you thinking about right now: relationships

26. Food: choco chip cookies

27. What are you doing at the moment: typing

28. Your summer: great

halo-halo thoughts on halloween

I'm sad today. i just learned that Ryan Philippe and Reese have split up. I love them as a couple. I have this thing for famous couples. It's either I love 'em or hate 'em. No in betweens. And I get really affected for days..like TomKat. That was hard to accept. But when I saw Suri, it changed everything. She's so beautiful.

I need a new book. Since last year, I didn't buy any new one since there are still some I haven't even started reading yet. So ok, I'm gonna try hard to find time for them soon so I can justify my new book purchase.

Yesterday, Yen and I had an impulse to go walking - my bones are starting to complain already while Yen was feeling sluggish. So off we went for a two hour walkathon. And it feels so good. I wish I could do it everyday. I know I can be sporty if I commit myself to it but...;) Maybe that could be my new year resolution.

My ate is 40 years old. She doesn't want to acknowledge it but yes she is starting her life today! My only sister is my role model. She's so different from me and yet we're the same. She's got great fair skin, can dance so well and is a fashionista. I get make-up and clothing tips from her. She is classy and her style is impeccable. She's organized, a squeaky clean girl. We're both quiet among other people but really loud when we're together and can be push-overs ( as in uto-uto ng mga taong panget hahaha). But we are shopaholics, we can spend the entire day at the mall and just find bargains for hours. We can read each other's minds. We never fight. The only time she got mad at me was 2 years ago but then it was over in 2.7 seconds. I love her generous heart and her fighting spirit. Just like my mom.

My Ate is my 2nd mom. The first time I ever got depressed was when she left for the States when I was 12 years old. I was inconsolable for weeks. I was just crying and pouting and wishing the world would end soon. She makes me want to be a better person and taught me not to settle. She took off the blindfold and made me see the light. Thank you so much Ate Mael. She was supposed to be named Cecilia Joy. I love you. Can't wait for another vacation with you and the kids!

I hope I can present the man you had in mind for me. Just you wait. Matagal-tagal pa. Hirap ng packaging. hahaha. Pero natuto na ko. Pramis.

year-end thoughts

Whenever November comes around, December is just a breath away. Next thing you know, it's frenzied shopping and partying galore. And then it's Christmas Eve and then New Year. and then my birthday..heehee.

When I was younger, I used to take stock of how my year turned out. I wrote monthly milestones and then capped the journal entry with some form of closure. a goodbye hello ritual. Now I only write my thoughts online and I missed my scribbles, the way my hand hurts from too much writing.

This year has been really slow and steady. Peaceful. Just watching my boy grow (walking, mimicking, cruising, tight hugging). Being with my sister and her kids (the best vacation ever). Being with Yen (ang haba ng hair - pila ang guys). And Dad (got him back from the wicked witch..hooray for the triumph of good vs. evil!). Assessing friendships. A new nephew (congrats jundee, hindi ka baog). A pleasant surprise which is still a work in progress (keeping my fingers crossed).

It's a time of getting more comfortable being a mother and acknowledging that my life is now more focused and more fulfilled. It's trusting the Lord when there are seemingly insurmountable obstacles. And then just believing..inspired by the mustard seed principle. I know a lot of changes will happen next year. I can sensed it as early as now. I just hope they're good changes. Super Didooper!

Now I'm excited for Christmas. Last year was chaotic since we were moving out and stuff. This time we're staying, building roots. Getting settled. Feels so good...